A Garden of Delights

Posts Tagged ‘perspective

The second shoe dropped…  or something, and while nothing screamed End Of The World, the violent tipping of its axis said serious Change (note the capital C…  big stuff here) was in the works.

:-/ Okay, so nothing really that drastic happened.  But despite all my plans to be more consistent this Round of words with my blogging, and to get a bunch of writing done, my progress on those goals I set out at the beginning of January has been close to nil.  Earlier in the round, while I was writing somewhat, I could clearly sense my head was in a “I need to be refilled” state.  I stepped down my writing and creative output in favor of reading and discovery, and dealing as best I could with the seasonal cloud that hits me each November through January.

This was tiding me over mostly.  I did get a bit lax with my blogging.  A lot of little things started picking at my brain and while I love you all, blogging is always the second thing to fall short (Twitter loses the fastest…  maybe because it always flows the fastest, and I so often feel lost in the deluge of tweets) as far as social media goes.  I’ve slacked off in all my social media though.  Facebook and email…

Too many little bits to deal with.

The newest is a real job search.  I’m terrified.  I haven’t in the job market for years, having spent most of my time of late in volunteer positions with my son’s various schools or homeschooling him.  But things have happened…  and now, not only do I have to homeschool The Boodle again (as much as he’d like to stay in Catholic school, he is not suited to that environment), but we need a second income in the home.

The most recent copy of my résumé I could find was from when I still lived in downtown Albany…  almost 30 years ago.

Yeeeah….

I have my work cut out for me.

So, apologies for being a bit short here, and for having been absent so long.

Stuff happened.


Also, just a small reminder…

Though it’s a bit late to bring this up, especially when I’ve been so very out-of-touch recently, I did want to mention that the linky for the First Friday Photo is open for submissions.  I’d love to hear from you all.

And if you’re interested in lovely photoblogs, have you checked out the grand people at image-in-ing. A lot of wonderful artists there, with so many interesting perspectives on the world to savor.

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I could have written my ROW80 (and my WWW Wednesday) check-in yesterday.  Instead…  I hit the library almost first thing in the morning, and by the time 6:30pm had passed, I’d already read the next of the Victoria Thompson Gaslight Mysteries that I’d picked up and had started the next one (I have 15 pages left on that).

Clearly, I’ve been on a huge reading binge lately.

Not so much a writing one.  Except for my blogging progress and a few new words on Courting and Marche (the 1st and 3rd books of the Swan Song Series), I haven’t written much of anything.  Haven’t even touched 750words since last Wednesday.  Have opened Scrivener and looked through stuff, read some research articles…

And had a lot of sick-kid and now kid-school related things to deal with since last Thursday night.

I could have written my post yesterday, but I needed to escape a bit.  And while reading about NYC murders in the late 1890s might not seem like escapism…  it was a divine one.

I have another six books fresh from the library waiting for me, calling my name.

I probably should have written those posts.  But I didn’t.

I did write this one.

Check?

Posted on: January 16, 2018

I wasn’t going to post anything here for the ROW80, had planned to just make a brief check-in at the Facebook page.  Sometimes it’s hard to feel like I’ve accomplished anything real.  Or…  if I’ve felt any amount of excitement about things I’ve done, the fact that I was excited meant I’d already shared them somehow (such as my recent Stream of Consciousness Saturday post) or my excited FB post on Thursday about the awesome creative burst I’d had while writing my 750 words.

So…  what to write without becoming repetitive?

Well, there is the fact that I haven’t missed a day of writing at 750words.com since my Wednesday check-in.  Tr, I haven’t always achieved the full 750, but Thursday I exceeded with 803, and on no day did I achieve less than 300.  If I counted all the words I typed while blogging and visiting/commenting, I’d be well-over every day, but I don’t feel right adding those.

I’ve maintained consistency in my blogging as well.  And my reading (though that hasn’t been as fast as I’d like).  My real downfall though, is my creative writing output.

Some of this is a lack of “office”…  as in, I have a pretty nice computer and desk (and an “OK” chair), but my husband, who  works from home, now occupies the office.  He likes to listen to interviews and talk (or tv shows).  I need music…  particularly repetitive songs (usually loud) to zone out on and be with my characters.

Just a tree by a ditch

It’s not fair to ask him to leave, or even smart. He’s actually earning a paycheck with what he’s doing, while I’m struggling to connect with my characters most of the time, playing solitaire while I ponder plot points.

So…  I’m looking for that elusive creative space and working on what I can in the interim.

Another Wednesday…

Time for another…

2018 ROW80 Check-in WWW Wednesday

Post

(click below an image to go to the specific section you want if you don’t want to read the whole post)

You can see I am making serious progress on that old consistency thing…

First things last and last things first, let’s go with WWW Wednesday where, according to the rules of the bloghop, I need to answer three main questions:

What are you currently reading?
What did you recently finish reading?
What do you think you’ll read next?

Currently? I’m still slowly plowing through Gun, Germs, and Steel by Jared Diamond.  I appreciate Diamond’s intelligence, and I enjoy the actual subject matter, but…  maybe my head just isn’t in it at the moment.  Sometimes I really just want to dive into escapism and mystery, and I have a lot of that on my reading list of late.  I’m also reading Haunt Couture and Ghosts Galore by Rose Pressey.  I can’t even say why to be honest.  I read the first two books of the series and liked them “enough”, but didn’t feel I loved them.  But here I am reading #3.  It’s kind of like the Charlie Plato books, I think.  I like just-enough-to-keep-going in them.

Recently? I finished Thursdays at Eight by Debbie Macomber.  It was a revelation.  I totally understand now about how she became a bestselling author.  It’s called a romance, and it is…  but the love interest was Life Itself.  A tale of four women and life…  I really enjoyed it.  Also, I decided to surrender to my inner mule and read that second book in Margaret Chittenden’s Charlie Plato mysteries: Dean Men Don’t Dance.  It was hard to get into, but I guess the heroine, Charlie, is growing on me.  And Monday evening, I finished The Chocolate Cat Caper by JoAnna Carla, a cozy with lots of chocolate trivia interspersed between the covers.  Oh, and a very gorgeous cat named Yonkers…

Next?  It’s pretty sad.  I can repeat my last week list because I moved a bunch of new books into their places: still have the next Molly Murphy mystery Death of Riley, Dear Life by Alice Munro, and the other eight books waiting for me at the library.  Never made it there.  First the weather didn’t hold out, and then I got sick.  It’s where I’m heading as soon as this gets posted.

*Update…  there were eleven books waiting for me, two of which were 600+ page books by Caleb Carr.  Yeah…  I’ve got some reading to do.


Now as far as my ROW80 progress is going…  pretty much good stuff.  Not a lot of new fiction…  I’m actually going to have a problem writing a WIPpet Wednesday post on Many Worlds because I’ve written so little except mind-dumping into 750words.  I didn’t write there on Monday and only wrote 600 of the words yesterday, but in all, more days than not came with some words.

The words weren’t story related, but I do see places where I might eventually evolve the feelings and ideas into characters or their reactions.  My husband and I have also been having some wonderful discussions about characters in shows we like to watch and some books we’ve traded.  It’s interesting to see how his perception of an event and mine differ and how what we believe is “normal” sometimes seems way off from what the writers seem to think it should be.

I’m starting to see why I used to get critiques that said “Why would she do that?  No one would do that!”; all the while I was thinking…  I have, or that I knew someone who did.

World-building…

And that is a topic for another day.  Saturday, to be exact, since our local RWA Chapter is hosting a World Building discussion at the East Greenbush library.  Hoping I can go, but it depends..  my son is participating in Future City at his school, and the local competition is happening this Saturday morning until late afternoon.  There’s a future city idea…  a way to safely clone one’s self just long enough to be in two places at one time and not harm the clone person in the returning of the mind/memories to the original person.  I have a feeling that idea is a long time in coming.

If you could design your perfect futuristic self, what would one thing you could do then be?

It’s nearing the end of the year.  Almost the end of another Round of Words in 80Days (a writing challenge I help host), as that ends on Wednesday.

As I look both forward and back, I’m struck by the resistance I’ve developed to blogging in general.  Maybe it’s that I handle three blogs now (the ROW80, here, and my “writing blog” Many Worlds from Many Minds)…  Maybe it’s the fear that nothing I have to post is really that interesting, or the knowledge that there are so very many voices out there already, that mine just doesn’t matter.

Thing is, I love to create…  stories, art, impressions.  And just because I grew up hearing “Hush, no one needs to hear your mouth run”, doesn’t mean there is nothing worth hearing in what I have to say.  I’ve been slowly learning to accept that my voice matters and that really…  there are people who really enjoy it.

But it’s been a slow process.  Part of the problem is the simple truth that there are so many other voices out there, speaking at the same time.  It’s no one’s fault.  We all deserve to be heard, but because it gets hard to rise out of the cacophony, failure can seem so absolute… so inevitable.  And truth be told, we’re not taught in all the lessons on how to promote ourselves effectively to actually promote ourselves effectively.  Yes, being the squeaky wheel does work well for some, but despite having the nickname of Mouse (actually the Mouse that Roared) for many years, I would rather not be known for how loud I can be… or the lengths I might go to make myself heard.

At least, if I feel I need to scream aloud, I want to know that no one has gotten sick of listening.  😛

What does all this have to do with blogging?  Or my resistance to it?

Well, I realize after a few years of trying to keep up with social media, trying to be that voice of so many, calling out in the wilderness, that the frantic scrambling for my pie of internet pie just felt… wrong.  No criticism to those who do it and enjoy it.  Some people out there have amazing social skills and just rock online interaction.

I’m just not one of them.

What I am is a person who needs to have a plan in place and follow it religiously.  If I don’t follow it religiously, my inner sloth takes over and lets all the squirrels in (actually, I think she just doesn’t get to the door in time).  And best if I am doing something for someone else.  When I need to do things for myself, it’s easy to let them slide…  tomorrow is fine.  Or maybe next week, next year.

If I know someone else needs something though…  I’ll jump.  If my teachers during my school years had only made it clear to me how much they needed me to study and do my homework, instead of suggesting that it was all for me, I’d probably be on my second PhD and developing some world-changing discovery in a secret laboratory somewhere now. (Though…  would you really know if I wasn’t?)

So instead of blogging less, I suspect, I need to blog more.  Certainly more consistently…  I need to participate in the mutual exchange of comments and challenges.  Not just the ROW80, but the IWSG (Insecure Writers Support Group) and post to bloghops like the WeWriWa and WIPpet via Many Worlds.  I just need to set my schedule clearly without trying to be always “out there”.  A solitary post per month on schedule is far better than a binge of posts followed by a dearth of them, which has been my recent pattern.

Next week will be the ROW80 “goals post”, and the half-formed plan I have for the future should be more-fully developed by then, so I’ll post it then.  The consistency of the ROW80 has been very good for my creative side, even when I’m not always prompt with my posts.  I intend to make even better use of my check-ins…  though I suspect I’ll be streamlining the process in certain ways.

For this week, I’m clearing some books from my TBR list.  I just finished a bag fill of mysteries, procedurals and romances that partly tweaked my interest, partly needed to be read for writing research.  I’m slogging my way through the new opening of Courting in the Swan Song Series.  It almost feels harder because of what is at stake here…  my membership change in the RWA and a Golden Heart entry. The holidays aren’t helping…  this year is coming with its own emotional burdens, but I haven’t dealt well with this season.  Too many personal losses….

Still…  plugging away.

 

 

I think I have an aversion to days off with my family.  Well, not really an aversion—I just…  become non-functional when one comes up.  Usually it’s a migraine.   Sometimes it’s a lack of sleep the night before (okay, so that’s really my fault; but there’s just this feeling of relaxation and indulgence I get as a “special” day comes up…  I tend to stay up and read or enjoy a favorite show).

Today it was a migraine.

That said…  it worked for us this time.  Because we didn’t hurry out for the original plan of heading out to “do all the things”, my awesome hubby was able to spend some time looking through reviews of local eateries and sights while I indulged in bed with a dark cool cloth over my eyes.  And afterward we went out for a lovely drive through the Heldebergs, a visit to the local Irish import store for puddings and biscuits, a super yummy early dinner at The Saloon (their food is great; their website…  not so much).

I also discovered a local Irish tea and cake shop where I can do some writing on occasion.

Some very small silver linings on what has been a difficult day for many people I know and love.

As for writing?  I’ve done that.  Been maintaining the website, getting in some exercise too.  Had to order another battery for my laptop yesterday…  donated a bunch of LEGO/Duplo toys to the library yesterday.  Getting a lot done, but very little of it has been stuff I’d planned on doing.

Sometimes plans really put a crimp in…  well, in one’s plans, and the only way to deal with that is to start doing what needs to be done and make a new plan on the fly.

As I said last week, I’ve done a lot of reading lately.  Different  genres, authors, size works….  This weekend I finally dipped my toes into the ocean that in James Patterson’s body of work.

Basically, I had to test out the hype for myself.

Now, I do have to confess that these works, two of the Bookshots series to be exact, were only co-authored by Patterson; they were also of a very different style than I normally read.  So to say I didn’t find myself as enthralled as I hoped I would be by the works of this mainstream master isn’t me trying to be critical of his work.

More it was me trying to be critical of myself.

I wanted to understand why I never read any of Patterson’s work (or Nora Roberts or… insert name of best-selling author here).  I often actively avoid such books, preferring to try someone with a smaller backlist or an author I’d never heard of before when I go looking to try something new.   So, yeah…  it was definitely about understanding the hype, but also wondering what made me avoid the “popular” books.  Was it years of high school angst that made me fear messing with the In-crowd.  Did I just inherently dismiss it all as booorr-ing mainstream fluff while the read “deep” things were being done behind closed doors in band and by the kids doing AP Bio and French?

Maybe…  Though also, knowing that many of Patterson’s works were highly action-driven stories, I wanted to see some of that writing style… well, in action.

The lessons I learned, as well those from last week’s foray into Barbara Pym’s and Sir Walter Scott’s works (Crampton Hodnet and Excellent Women as well as The Talisman and Ivanhoe respectively) and my feast of Denise Swanson’s Scumble River detective stories (one a day keeps me at the library) are…

  • putting down a Bookshot book is easy, almost as easy as Ivanhoe, but not nearly as satisfying to pick up again
  • if I’d known about Pym’s works sooner, I’d be a serious Austenite instead of the half-hearted one I am now.
  • I need a series.  Seriously…  if I can’t follow characters through several books (or seasons if it’s a video thing), then it better be a very long book
  • most contemporary fiction characters do not act the way I would write them acting but many of the more classical characters do
  • there’s not much action in an action scene…  at least in a Bookshot

There’s more of course.  But this post is getting long already and I still have a ROW80 check-in to finish.

So, how’d I do?

  • I didn’t quite manage the daily note in my journal.  Some days I didn’t really write anything except texts to be honest.
  • Devouring books however was right on course.  Saturday morning I returned 18 finished books (including the four listed above) to the UHLS and two to the MHLS.  As my interlibrary loan requests were still in transit, I picked up a few books from the books sale and freebies racks to tide me over.  Finished three of those and now working on a romance by a fellow member of our local RWA chapter.
  • I think this definitely qualifies as a mini-post about books I’ve read, though it definitely can’t be called a review
  • have not set anything into motion at the ROW80 blog, though I did have last weeks posts up on schedule for a change
  • and no outline for ‘Listii’s story…  silly man is trying to urge me to return to the Swan Song Series books instead of focusing on him, so I’ve outlined and replotted that

Pretty much all my stuff so far.  This coming week is bound to be extra hectic, so I am probably not going to be posting on Wednesday.  Just sayin’.

 


First Friday Photo

Something to inspire

obligatory “What I Allow”

Short Stuff

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